Happiness Is A Choice
by kb5000
Summary: She wanted to leave, even went willingly. She knew no one would miss her, she'd just fade away. The only thing she didn't plan was another life. I don't own Elsewhere, or my photo, just my characters and story-line. Rated T for Depression and Suicide
1. Chapter 1: Giving Up

_ "I_ didn't_ want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that's really sad. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you're so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare." - Ned Vissini, It's Kinda a Funny Story_

_According to you, I'm stupid, I'm useless, I can't do anything right -Orianthi_

_HIACHIACHIAC_

I stare at the bottle. In my mind, it symbolizes hope. Something I lost a long time ago. I haven't felt happiness in a long time. Getting older, maturing, made life so much harder. No one loved me anymore. Everyone left and found someone new. My parent's found Talia. My Best Friend found her boyfriend. I found no one.

Nobody will care. They all hate me anyways. I'm the one no one wants to be around. Everyone seems to run away. i come home to an abusive family and home work I can't understand. Nobody helps me though. My mother says I'm lazy. My father says I'm stupid. Talia says I'm horrible.

They say I'm worthless.

Nothing is holding me back. I climb onto my back and glance at the envelope which holds my goodbye letter and will. The will contains nothing special. Just my college fund, seeing as I'm only 17. Last year, I was ecstatic to leave. College would be my escape. I could be free. My father crushed my dreams by telling me I was to stupid, and even if I made it in, he wouldn't pay or let me go.

Before I talk myself out of this, I grab my glass of water and the bottle of pills and take them all in one chug. I sip my water, grab the envelope and lean back and close my eyes.

It's better this way. I was dead inside anyway.

Goodbye.

_HIACHIACHIAC_

Kameryn Cassidy walked into her home behind her youngest daughter and her husband. They had all just returned from Talia's ballet recital and were so proud of her daughter. She seemed to excel at everything, while - always seemed to screw things up. She began to climb the stairs, heading toward her eldest daughter's bedroom.

"Honey? Did you get your chores done?" As she asked, she sighed, knowing she would be doing the chores once again either way. She yanked open the door and saw her daughter... Sleeping? " Sweetheart?" She walked toward her eldest, and as the realization set in, she screamed. " BABY!"

"Kameryn? Are you OK?" As she ran toward her daughter's still figure, she heard her husband walk into their previous child's bedroom.

"NO! OF COURSE NOT NEAL! SHE'S GONE!" Kameryn was met with silence. After about a minute of her sobs filling the void, Neal spoke again.

" Good."

Kameryn spun around, her tear stained, black locks trailing behind her. _" __What? "_

" You heard me. Things will be better without her. She was always screwing things up, and making our lives horrible. In my opinion, I'm _glad_ she's gone."

Kameryn stood up and stalked up to Neal. " HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT? SHE _KILLED_ HERSELF! OUR FLESH AND BLOOD!" She fell to the ground and curled into a ball. " She's gone," She whispered." All gone..."

Neal crouched down and tried to put his hand on her back, but she snapped and crawled away. " Go. Don't come back if you can't mourn for your daughter." She hissed, then went back to her daughter's side. Neal sighed while running his fingers through his short, brown hair, then left.

Kameryn stayed by her eldest's bedside for what seemed like hours, until she heard a whisper come from the doorway. " Mommy?"

_'Talia' _Kameryn realized. How would she tell her her sister was gone? Talia walked over to her sister and shaked her. " Hey! Get up! You're making Mom sad!" Talia demanded, while shaking her harder. " WAKE UP!"

Kameryn crawled to her youngest and grabbed her shoulders. " Talia... She's not gonna wake up."

Talia only stared. " ...What do you mean?"

Kameryn swiped the tears and her hair out of her face, and looked her 9-year-old daughter dead in the eyes. " She...She went to a better place."

Talia gasped and stuttered out " You d-don't me-mean..." Kameryn only nodded in response.

" No..." Talia fell to the ground and began to cry, her golden locks that differentiated her from her family tangled and covered her face. Kameryn gathered her daughter and joined her as they cried together.

_HIACHIACHIAC_

I wake up, feeling...happy. I'm surprised because happiness is a rare thing in my life. I'm so shocked by the emotion, I forget the night before. As happy as I am, it comes back quickly. I'm disappointed. It should have worked. I shouldn't be breathing. Only when I open my eyes and see a bunk above me do I realize it did work.

I just didn't plan another life.

_HIACHIACHIAC_

_ Do you lock yourself in your room, With the radio on turned up so loud, That no one hears you screaming?- Simple Plan_

_HIACHIACHIAC_

**A.N: Wow...This is really depressing. I don't know where this came from, but it's now a story! I was having an Off-Day, I was all sad, so I started writing, and I'd wanted to do an OC story, and I figured this fit under Elsewhere. Thanks for reading, and I'll hopefully update soon! Bye!**

**BTW= If You're a OUAT fan, You'll probably get a hidden message in here, even though I'm Captain Swan. Also, The main character doesn't have a name yet because I haven't decided on one yet... so ya. BYE!**


	2. Chapter 2: Lost At Sea

_I'm dancing with tears in my eyes;Just fighting to get through the night:I'm losing it, With every move I die- Ke$ha_

_HIACHIACHIAC_

_I slowly pull open the door to my house, praying that it doesn't creak. I slide it shut, then turn back around and head for the stairs. I climb up on the balls of my feet, barely touching the ground. I'm almost there, I can see my purple bedroom walls. I grin softly to myself, then take the final step and shut the door. I quickly slide the lock into place, and glide my body down so I'm curled up on the ground. _

_I hear his voice, yelling for me, calling me hateful names. I just absorb them, knowing they're true. I'm horrible and I'm not allowed to forget it. I stay in my ball for what feels like a hour, but eventually I unfold myself and crawl to my desk. I hear him banging on the door, but the lock holds so I ignore him. I pull out the middle drawer and remove it's contents. After everything is out, I remove the false bottom of the drawer._

_Inside, I pull out my book. I put the bottom back in and after changing out off my stained clothes, I crawl into my bed. I hear him slowly give up and crawl away, mumbling how he'll get me tomorrow. I open my book, and let my emotions out into the pages before I drift into a nightmare-filled slumber. _

_HIACHIACHIAC_

"No, no no..." I moan, smacking my palm against my forehead. I didn't even consider an after-life. Actually, I was just glad to leave. Be done with my horrible existence Apparently, I have more planned than I thought.

With a sigh, I push my midnight-brown hair from my eyes and push myself off my bed. I stand, then turn and spot a window. I sigh, then shove my face into the tiny circle. Squinting around the dense amount of fog, I see... my Mom. She's kneeling on the ground, her arms wrapped around something I can't see. Before I can get a better look, the image fades, and I'm left staring at clouds.

" How's the afterlife treating you?" I tense at the random voice and turn around and face it. I come face-to-face (well, more face-to-chest) with a boy about my age. I glance upward and look into his almost black navy-blue eyes, his brown hair that just barely covers his eyes. His chisled features. I stare, then finally manage to reply.

" Not too bad. Just didn't expect one." He laughs, then tells me he agrees.

" I hope this isn't to soon, but...how did you die?" I ask, looking down at my white sandals, my caramel hair covering my face. He looks away, over his shoulder, and slowly pulls down his shirt collar.

" I couldn't stand it anymore. No one even cared that I was miserable. I told my Mom about my problems, and she _laughed._ So I gave up. No point in living a life that ain't worth living." His head was still facing the corner as I stared at his neck. He had a large bruise, that coiled around his neck, and looked almost like...rope.

In that moment, I realized He'd hung himself.

"...Pills."

He faces me once more. "What?" He seems taken aback.

" Pills. A drug overdose. Your not the only one who took their own life because they're worthless. They just happened to bunk two of those people together." I glance upward and smile at him. "Now we both have someone who understands."

He smiles, then laughs. I begin laughing also until we're both gasping for air. I realize, I feel slightly happy. Something rare in my life. As we both lie there, struggling to breathe, he extends his hand, and offers it for a shake.

" Dylan Swan."

I grab his hand and shake back. " Alexandra Cassidy."

_HIACHIACHIAC_

_Can you pretend I'm amazing, Instead of what we both know?- Blue October_

**A.N: I'm back! So, I hope you enjoyed Chapter 2! I know she's happier a bit early on, but it'll get sadder later on. Have an awesome week!**_  
_

**BTW: My prayers go out to anyone who was effected by the bombs in Texas and Boston. :( **


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